Many people confuse sympathy with empathy and vice versa, so I will start by explaining the difference between the two responses. Sympathy is an acknowledgment of feelings, and empathy provides a deeper, more supportive understanding and connection.
I will give an example. If someone is experiencing parenting struggles with a small baby:
- Sympathy: “Wow, that sounds really tiring. I am sorry you are feeling this way.”
- Empathy: “I remember feeling completely drained during those early months. If you need a break or someone to talk to, please let me know.”
Why Empathy is a Leader’s Greatest Tool
As leaders, we are often in situations where we can see someone is under strain. We can either give them sympathy and say, “I am sorry to hear about your problem, I hope it gets better soon,” and then walk away, or we can lead with empathy by being prepared to stop, listen, and offer help to the individual.
Our lives have become incredibly busy because we no longer work from 8-5; we work from 5-9. The game changer is mobile phones and emails on our phones. If we allow ourselves to answer calls and emails anytime, day or night, then people will expect us to answer. If you are not a doctor and are unlikely to save anybody’s life, then why are you always available?
The Importance of Protecting Your Time
That is easier said than done when you are an entrepreneur and you run your own business. If you are a leader, you have to protect yourself, your family, and your precious time. Be deliberate in how you use your phone when you are at home and it is outside working hours.
Getting to Know Your Team
Leading a team with empathy takes a lot of time and effort, as you really need to get to know your team members and be willing to learn how to speak their “love language.” Some people are driven by money, but not everybody, so you have to understand what makes them tick and zone in on their likes and dislikes. There is no doubt that leading with empathy is a strength, but it does take time and a lot of effort.
We live in a country where millions of people wake up every day without hope. How do you lead someone who wakes up in the morning with no hope? How do you get someone to follow you when they have no hope that tomorrow might be slightly better than today? How do you lead someone who is not sure that they will be able to provide food for their family tonight? You lead them with empathy. You make sure that your staff are aware of the fact that you understand their situation and that you deeply care about them and their families.
Empathy Is a Choice, Not a Skill
Are you hiring and firing, or are you leading with empathy and creating an environment where workers can feel safe, appreciated, and well-rewarded? Leading with empathy is a choice and not a skill.
GET IN TOUCH
If you would like to get in touch with me about my key note presentation, Debunking Motivation, please send an email to corne@cornekrige.com. Visit my website to review my speaker sheet for more info. I also share my story on my social media pages on Facebook and LinkedIn.